shut up and kiss me

I've been to a few wedding ceremonies but I've never really paid attention to what goes on. I got no idea what that priest guy is yammering on about.

The things everybody knows though are the "Do you take blabla" - "I do" - "Do you take blablabla" - "I do" - "I now pronounce blablabla, you may kiss the bride."

I think it's funny that this priest guy gots to give people the permission to kiss. He's running this shin-dig and there will be no kissing without his approval. The only situation in life that comes close to being similar to this is having a restraining order expire.

But as weird as this is, I think these priest guys would be pretty handy. I haven't been in a whole lot of kissing situations outside of my dogs, and they can't object anyway... but to me it seems deeming a moment in time kissing-appropriate would be a very hard decision to make. I've said before I have enough trouble picking what kinda ice cream I want at Baskin Robbins, and these kissing decisions have to be made on the spot, I'm not up for that kinda pressure. I need a few hours to analyze the pros and cons... weigh the possible consequences.

So having a priest around would be a huge help. You're sitting there, staring, not sure if this is a kiss moment, then bible-boy chimes in "You may now kiss the date" and you go for it. It could be five minutes into the first date, after you accidentally run over her pet cats, and if this priest gives gives you the go ahead... you can't really argue it. This is what he does for a living. It's practically God telling you to lock lips.